Jade: …I’d definitely want to see you again soon.
Me: I don’t blame you.
Jade: I forgive you.
So this is the upswing. Finally, things started looking up after I settled my finances. I hate to admit it, as I said to Nikki, but money does make you happy. Well, money helps make being happy easier.
Last week spelled an end to the slump that I have been on for a while now. This makes writing difficult so allow me to detail the events prosaically.
In case you don't know yet, a big part of my job has to do with meeting people and conducting administrative hearings. I administer discipline. So I constantly have to go on meetings to talk about whether a person should be fired from work or not.
Very serious, nerdy and stressful stuff.
These meetings usually happen at the end of the employees' shifts so this is around 6AM onwards my time. This is usually the time I'm most active. And by active I mean real attentive, quick-witted, etc. etc.
Venti Vanilla Tea Latte
Was it a year?
Was it several lifetimes ago?
You look like you
Didn’t even see me coming.
You avoided my gaze,
I weighed the weight
Of sadness you’re bearing.
Grande Coffee Jelly
It was a year.
It was several lifetimes ago.
I was blog-hopping to increase some traffic into my wordpress blog.
Yes, WordPress has a feature that ticks off my competitive/obsessive nature… BlogStats. It’s a horrendous affirmation of my need for attention. Yuck, I am such a three-year old.
So I did something that really helped out. I joined a blog community. And I started posting links on my Facebook Wall.
Sad to say, the weekly assignments were suspended (after the week I joined) so my blog has been in the dark for a bit.
Imagine a cat being run over by a car. Its forelegs up like a black man pulled over by a beat cop, hindlegs spread awkwardly apart, the way the "walk" sign is.
Now imagine me at that position, sprawled on the couch.
"I can't breathe," I told Nikki. She always has a way of expressing extreme concern. "What's wrong? Are you okay?" I felt like a blanket of thick mist was draped over me, invading my nostrils, I had to breathe through my mouth.
You're very far
like a star that
You are, tonight.
Out of sight, then
All bright: twinkling.
I'm hoping for
Something, that you
Turn out to be
A true falling
star, hoping you're
Wish I might that
Your light, oh star,
Won't stay far. Wish
You are falling,
I'm praying, you're
Falling for me.
Anniversary namin ni Day kahapon.
Okay, technically, hindi naman kami. Pero napagkasunduan namin (meaning, ininsist ko sa kanya) na anniversary talaga namin ang June 27. Yun kasi ang unang beses na nag-usap kami ever. Sabi ko sa kanya na dapat magdate kami ng June 27, pero since Pride Parade nung sabado at dahil 7PM na siya umuwi kinabukasan, at aaminin ko, hindi rin ako umalis ng bahay, hindi kami natuloy.
He is sprawled helpless, whelmed beyond measure
Here on the field of fetid cotton sheets.
He ponders: was it love? Convenience?
Whatever the case, it doesn't matter.
Pain and joy both syncopate his heartbeats.
The difference, he reckoned was patience.