"I 'Love' and 'Hate' this Damness"

by Engr_Liw ()

...oh yes im not that good at expressing myself most especially when its d matters of the heart… I tend to confide them within me… beneath this pleasure-filled face of mine lurks an agonizing feeling… so intense that might just snap in a matter of seconds… I don’t know but I just found out, that im more comfortable expressing myself to those people that aren’t close to me… those people who are called strangers… I know this is not healthy yet, I find them helpful… they tend to be ‘not biased’ and see things in all its perspectives… yes… I know there is something wrong about me right now… the fact that im writing this damn blog in English means something.. I rarely write things in English… in love?... totally… truly..;. madly… deeply… the kinda feeling that I have never ever felt in my entire life. Is this really love or is it a mere infatuation… a mere fantasy driven by extensive desire and longing for someone whom I deem special to me… this is crazy… I can tell you.. and it really shows… there’s not a minute in this damn earth that passes away that im not thinking of that person… we just got a little ‘closer’ this term but… sigh… somehow already did change me a lot… I don’t know but right now im VERY VERY VERY VERY confused… and this feeling really hurts… piercing through the veins of my rigid heart.. escalating the heat to a level beyond a humans control… I don’t know… honestly… im having doubts… does that person really love me… or am I just imagining and interpreting things favorable for me… am I mesmerized by the face that I always stare at… sigh… or is it just a mere ‘sprung of the moment’ for us… indulging to the situation just to make things more exciting and when nxt term comes… everything would start to turn upside down.. or maybe im just thinking too much… Maybe things would work out well in the coming days… maybe.. maybe … or maybe not… I ‘love’ and ‘hate’ this damness.

by alcor eldioan on June 7, 2011 - 2:03pm

I can relate..

we just can't explain so we think a lot about it. trying to extract at least a clue. trying to predict. always, there's something about something behind  something due to something after something about love. all about that stupid feeling or how you define it. damness. 

love or hate. make yourslef feel. (no "at least I feel" )

 love is exponential



I love your words.