No, this blog isn't about reincarnation as we know it. It is my personal journey towards a new life after the "death" of my marriage.

I am now opening a new chapter of my life, that of being legally single. I have finally filed for annulment after four years of separation from my husband of seven years.

Looking back, I still feel sad that we didn't survive the so-called "seven-year itch".  I also feel sad that my kids didn't get to feel having a complete family for long - my son had just turned 5 and my daughter 4 when their dad and I separated. As to how and why we separated, read my short story "Deceived" (it's an almost true-to-life account except the last part with the phone call).

It wasn't an easy journey. I struggled with my new status- from a wife and mother to just being mother. In the first few months, I had to try and get over the rejection ... of being called ugly and desperate. I struggled with the many more insults hurled at me by the man I gave the honor of being the father of my children, my first love...my only boyfriend, the only man in my life.

It took me two more years to finally decide that I have to stop loving him... or even hating him. I realized that any emotion I will attach to him will only bind me to my past and will not help me move on.  I used to believe that I needed to do everything I could to fight for my family, not for my sake but for my kids. But two years is long enough to fight for someone who is not worth fighting for. It was now my turn to decide to let go.

And I am happy I did.

I realized now that my marriage became like a quicksand. The more I struggled to be the perfect wife and mother, the more I lost my true self... I tried so hard to please everyone that I failed to ask myself if I was still happy doing the things I did to please the people around me. I got so tired.

My sister once said that there will come a day that I will thank my ex for leaving me.  She also said that one day I will look back and see that life has been better after this painful experience. That day is now.

My kids are doing well despite our situation. They still get to see their dad and I would want them to maintain a good relationship with him.  Despite all his failures as a husband, I know that my ex loves my kids.

Me? I got promoted to a top executive position in the company I've been working for for 12 years. I now drive my own car. I'm also working on a lot of projects that I've put on hold when I was busy trying to be Mrs. Perfect, and that includes my dream of becoming a writer.

So with all the good things coming my way, allow me to thank my ex now ...

"Thank you for coming into my life because you have given me wonderful kids. And thank you for leaving me, because when I lost you, I found myself."