luca:dissected
I take a scalpel
to the leatherys
heath of this
conversation.
I cut a shallow 'v'
enough to break its cover
but not to damage the
tender layers below:
of cheeks resting on chests
and hands grasping arms,
of sweat forming
as seeds in the cold
of slumbering.
I pick this pocket-
gingerly-to reveal you
and me
so that tiny droplets
of blood manifest like
little puddles on the greasy
mantle of this leaf
that feeds us.
While there is no sun
to nourish us
and the leaf breathes
in and out like a
smoker's lungs-
dying a retarded suicide.
How we hold our breaths for fear of saying
'i love you'
and be bound by it.
Obliged.
And no longer be able to
wander like the tendrils
of this (apparently)
vast network of vines.
We speak in cuts
and bruises.
In semi-permanence.
In reminders
drawn in the viscuous mud
that eventually succumbs
to gravity to form
nothing.
To make clear
what i always meant
but could never speak:
that there is only now
and nothing else.
Lest you be torn
and forever be scarred.
The leaf turns brown.
Then crisp.
Then eventually severs
itself from the it
i made you believe existed.
To join the mud
where new nonreminders
will thenceforth be drawn.


