Dear Diary,

Living alone is not that easy. Emptiness is always there, and the feeling of not being loved is very annoying. Each day, I see a lot of people around but I can’t figure it out why I sometimes don’t hear any sound, except the lonely beating of my heart.

I’ve been to places where I hope to find someone who would love me most. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t make myself happy and contented, yet, I couldn’t find that someone who truly loves me. Maybe I am not fortunate to find my true love.

If given a chance to talk to God, I would want Him to lead my way to get the answer to the quest of my broken heart. I have prayed many nights, but I seem to be in a place where prayers are not answered. I seem to be in a land where angels are deaf and blind. I don’t see the logic of being capable to love and be loved. I have traveled a thousand miles, but at the end, there’s nothing to see but myself sitting all alone…..crying. Maybe I only just supposed, but I am completely torn.

Friends advised me to wait, so I waited. They say, there’s one for me, so I keep hoping. However, the hoping and waiting only make me sick each time I look at those happy lovers around me. It only breaks my heart. It doesn’t make any sense to meet my soul mate, should I say it. If it does, then where is my Romeo? Where could I find him? Would he love me for what I am? Would he care to live with me? Would he not hurt me?

Each night as I go to bed, I try taking  all these things out of my mind, but they are nightmares that I really couldn’t get rid of. I’m tired of living.

Love,

Kylle Brosnan