sometimes i woke up as if iwere a different person, or sometimes i went to this kind of place and felt like i already visited that particular place... -- De-javu, i read it. i am always fond of collecting materials that are too old or too fragile to handle, old photographs taken wayback 1890's or let's just say , those pictures at the time were my great grand parents are still at their peak of youthful. i used to be classical or too old-fashioned in several ways, and all my friends also notice that. when we were duty at Sta. cruz laguna provincial hospital, my only way of overcoming my boredom while travelling for almost an hour is to look outside the jeepney and try to look for something essential that sounds interesting to me --- OLD HOUSES! that i think was built during spaniards' colonization, Dr. Jose RIzal's time i guess...

i don't know or if it's just my mind or myself who thinks that i also was a part of a certain past era and live a life that has a big difference compared to my present years.

i don't want to believe myself in thinking that i was unable to retrieve my past years, that all of it was just an annoyance to me full of fatal twist and was unable to reconcile in my own battle according to my utmost concern about my identity. i was always like this, and i suddenly know why i was always left with several questions that was remained unanswered... unclear...undone.

notice me for my weird essentiality in life, 'cause i know that someday... my life... my light will find a way.